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Couples need sex

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If it’s been years since your last orgasm, would you bring it up with your partner or brush it off, thinking that orgasms in sex are myths? If your intimacy needs are not met, would you just carry on with your life, until you implode?

According to a study published in The Australian and New Zealand Journal of Public Health, Australian men in committed relationships experience more physical pleasure and emotional satisfaction than women.

The study showed that over 50 per cent of men were extremely satisfied with both sex and emotional intimacy in their relationships. Women on the other hand were less fulfilled with only 37.4 per cent extremely satisfied with the sex and only 43.9 per cent, emotionally content with their partners.

Professor Matthew Yau, certified sex therapist and Head of Occupational Therapy at James Cook University said: “Older men tend to enjoy sex more in a committed relationship, sex is not only meeting a sexual urge, it is more about creating a bond with one another.

“In a stable relationship, you have continuity, a sense of belonging and assurance. Humans have intimacy needs, it’s like water, air and food. Sex is one of the direct ways to meet these needs,” he said.

Although the study showed that women were less satisfied emotionally and physically, Prof Yau said that it is not because women enjoy sex less, it is because the men probably do not know how to push the right buttons or satisfy women properly.

Through this study the male and female participants expressed how they would ideally like to have sex more often. The question is why don’t they?

“In modern society, everyone (both men and women), are egoistic and individualistic. Everyone is absorbed in themselves. Sex is an agreement and a common consensus. Nowadays, everyone is just too busy with no time to connect,” Prof Yau said.

There are so many books and magazines in the market giving couples tips and tricks on how to spice up their love lives. The good news is, couples don’t need books or magazines telling you do dress up like Tarzan and Jane, all couples need is communication.

Prof Yau said: “The most important thing couples should do in a long-term relationship is to put sex as a priority. When you put it in focus, it’s not really about sexual pleasure but intimacy.

“Just communicate with one another, talk about your fantasies and set up a special time just for yourselves, not just for sex but to talk and build passion for one another,” he said.

Sex is a natural part of any loving relationship. If communication with your partner is not enough to bring back that spark, you can visit your local GP to find out if the problem is physical. Otherwise, couples can pay a visit to sex counsellors or therapists to get the help they need.

By Mariel Chow

(Source: Edith Cowan University’s 3rd DEGREE: The Australian and New Zealand Journal of Public Health)

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Posted On: 16 November, 2011
Modified On: 28 August, 2014

Created by: myVMC